I haven’t written here in a while, mostly because we had a long bout of fantastically sunny, summery weather, making it impossible to sit in front of my laptop, and then I had a wonderful week in the Baltic visiting my son on the ship he’s performing on. I wish I had better photos, but I left my photographer behind!
I quite expected my disease to be far more advanced by this time. In fact, I thought it likely I’d be dead. But instead I’ve been feeling much better since most of the chemo effects have worn off. I’m strangely healthy for a terminally ill person! Though full of uncomfortable tumours in my abdomen, my symptoms are miraculously minor so far. With effective pain medication, I am still happily active, joyfully greeting each new day. Of course, there are darker days now and then. And sometimes moments of listlessness or vague unrest. Truly though, real suffering is rare and celebration the rule. I am enormously appreciative of this time.
But being energetic again has me focused more on living than dying. So I’m often out wandering in search of overlooked beauty, or tinkering with other creative projects. So this blog has been neglected. It’s hard to remind myself that this time will be short when I still have so much vitality. How natural it is to plan for the future! And to procrastinate!
I do believe that all the positive thoughts, energy, and prayers I have been receiving from so many of you are a big part of why I am relatively well right now and able to enjoy the magnificent gift of these days. I feel so privileged and blessed to be the recipient of all this goodness and love, and I wish I could properly thank all who are sending it. Please know I am so grateful!
(Just for fun, here’s a video of Nathan practising his act with his porter Max on the ship. Luckily I didn’t witness this sort of slip while I was watching in person.)